The end of the year is supposed to be reflective.
For me, it mostly feels like relief that the holidays are behind us.
Ever since we lost Atticus, the stretch from late summer through Christmas has been heavy. The anxiety starts to creep in about a month before the anniversary of his death, and from there it’s a long emotional runway — anniversary, birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas.
Each milestone carries its own weight. By the time Christmas Day arrives, I usually feel a small release — like I can finally set the load down for a bit.
Having grandbabies has softened the edges. They bring joy back into the season in ways I didn’t expect. And still, it’s bittersweet. Two things can be true at once.
This year also marked a major transition for me. I stepped away from my role as a gym owner — another decision that carried both grief and gratitude. Life made it clear that staying wasn’t sustainable.
I’m thankful for the people who stepped in to continue what I built. Knowing that it will keep serving others matters more than I can put into words.
What I couldn’t step away from, though, is who I’ve become as a coach. Helping people navigate their health and wellness — especially when life is complicated — still feels like a calling. I was shaped by great coaches along my own journey, and paying that forward isn’t optional for me.
So while I’m no longer running a physical gym, I’m still here. Still learning. Still showing up.
And right now, that starts with me.
Today is Day 3 of a simple 28-day reset. Balanced. Reasonable. And still not easy.
One part of this reset is daily reflection — something many of us skip in the rush of everyday life, saving it all up for the end of the year when things finally slow down.
I wonder if that’s part of why grief feels heavier this time of year. Without space to reflect regularly, it accumulates until something has to give.
I don’t have answers yet.
But I’m paying attention.
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